Rice University’s Student Newspaper — Since 1916

Saturday, July 27, 2024 — Houston, TX

News in rhyme

By Anthony Lauriello     1/16/13 6:00pm

 

Notre Dame linebacker caught in a lie

Te'o and the Ghost (to the tune of Beauty and the Beast)



Tale as old as time

True, as it can be

But probably a lie 

A linebacker in need of love

A woman on the coast

One tackles blokes

The other is a hoax

Te'o and the Ghost 

But then from above

God called the girl home

At least that's what Te'o said

That his dear love was dead

On air to Jim Rome 

Tale as old as time

A man falls for hoax

True, as it can be

But probably a lie

Te'o and the Ghost

Manti Te'o's deceased girlfriend was revealed to be a fraud this weekend. The Notre Dame linebacker claimed he was victim of a hoax, though many believed he invented the girlfriend, her battle with Leukemia and the inspiration it caused him this football season.

Obama presents gun control legislation

Obama announced that he thinks ammunition rounds should be small

And that gun show rules would have to go through a strict overhaul

And that no one should be able to use assault weapons

The NRA sees these policies as a veritable Armageddon

And they feel a great deal of resentment

About what they see as an attack on the 2nd amendment

Obama says he is willing to fight

But chances of him passing anything in this congress are slight.

President Barack Obama unveiled a combination of legislation and executive orders for gun control this Wednesday in the wake of the Newton Massacre in Connecticut last December. The NRA has vowed to fight the proposals.



More from The Rice Thresher

NEWS 6/5/24 7:37pm
NOD permanently canceled, Rice strips away-decades old campus tradition

After 50 years of decadence, Wiess College’s infamous underwear party is no more.  Born in the early 1970s after a group of Wiess students poured all their alcohol into a bathtub — creating a brew “so potent it removed the varnish” — Night of Decadence has spent years in the national eye. Allegedly recognized as one of Playboy’s top college parties in the nation, NOD has also been subject to mounting scrutiny over alcohol use and an “explicitly dangerous and sexual atmosphere.” Rice has now permanently canceled the public, Dean of Undergraduates Bridget Gorman and Wiess magister Flavio Cunha announced in a message to campus June 5.

NEWS 5/24/24 11:48am
Rice Mutual Aid partners with student organizations to fundraise for Gaza

Rice Mutual Aid launched a fundraising campaign for Gaza on May 13 in partnership with 15 other student organizations at Rice, including Rice Students for Justice in Palestine, Rice Pride, the Hispanic Association for Cultural Enrichment at Rice and the Rice Muslim Student Association. RMA will direct donations towards American Near East Refugee Aid, a non-governmental organization that provides humanitarian aid and emergency relief in Palestine, Lebanon and Jordan. A day after its launch, the campaign raised over $2,000 according to RMA’s Instagram.


Comments

Please note All comments are eligible for publication by The Rice Thresher.