News In Rhyme
Berlusconi offers resignation
Silvio Berlusconi survived many a lewd sex scandal and allegation
But alas he could not wither the debt crisis hitting the Euro nations
So to make sure creditors could trust the Italian government
And that he would not be the one to prevent the money from being lent
Good old Berlusconi who refused to surrender decided to offer to step down
And so Italy will lose its bellicose prime minister who recently became a clown
Silvio Berlusconi offered to resign in order to secure any potential bailout of Italy whose high debts are beginning to undermine its credit.
Rick Perry Forgetful
There once was a man named Rick Perry
Who during the debates was never merry
He wanted to cut government agencies
But he couldn't remember which three
And his embarrassing gaffe was in public for all to see
In Wednesday night's Residential Republican debate, Rick Perry said there were three government agencies he wanted to cut, but could not think of the third one. This embarrassment was just another in a slew of blunders threatening the viability of his presidential bid.
Annise Parker wins reelection
Annise Parker won her election for mayor of our town
But her margin of victory was deserving of pity
The Rice grad barely won more than half the vote
Against opposition of barely any note
But winning is winning as they say
And for two more years Parker is here to stay
Annise Parker won the mayoral election, but only by 51 percent, far lower then would be expected considering her incumbency and the lack of any strong opposition
More from The Rice Thresher
Rice Pride ended its partnership with Houston Hillel, a Jewish campus ministry at Rice, on Sept. 18. Pride’s latest statement on the decision says that the organization will no longer “receive funding or co-create spaces with Houston Hillel” and cited concerns by Palestinian and Arab students who did not feel comfortable engaging in Pride due to the partnership.
The Baker Institute will hold its 30th anniversary gala Oct. 26, welcoming three former secretaries of state: Henry Kissinger, Hillary Clinton and James Baker.
Rice announced a plan to establish an Academic Resources Center staffed by trained professionals in an email to academic fellows on Sept. 20. Led by Senior Associate Provost Matt Taylor and Dean of Undergraduates Bridget Gorman, this multi-year plan will begin with the development of a paid peer tutoring and teaching assistant program.