News In Rhyme
Herman Cain proposes tax plan
There once was man named Herman Cain
And he offered a tax plan most plain
Calling it nine, nine, nine
Some thought it was fine
But experts met it with disdain
There was another man named Perry
And of Cain's plan he was weary
So he made up his own
And it would require a loan
Without spending cuts most scary
Republican presidential candidate Herman Cain surged ahead in the polls. According to reports from some agencies, Cain has taken the front-runner position.
His main platform—the 9-9-9 plan—composed of a nine percent national income tax, nine percent corporate tax and 9 percent national sales tax has receive considerable media attention.
The fact that no trained economist helped draft the plan has led to considerable derision, especially from those on the left, but Cain's popularity remains high for now.
To counter, Rick Perry offered his own plan with a 20% flat tax that taxpayers could voluntarily opt into and a 20% corporate tax.
Since this plan would drastically reduce government revenue, it also comes with drastic spending cuts, including those to entitlement programs.
The Euro Zone crisis in nursery rhymes
Ring around the continent
A pocketful of Euros
We all fall down!
Hey diddle diddle
Europe has a riddle
The South has debt higher than the moon
The North is tired of paying
And the banks need to be bailed out real soon
The country of Greece sat on a wall
The entire economy had a great fall
All the German monies, And all the French banks
Couldn't put Greece together again!
European countries are continuing to try to stave off the debt crisis this time, convincing banks to accept fifty percent losses on their loans to debt-riddled countries. Investors hope that this will finally help alleviate dangers of the Euro failing.
More from The Rice Thresher
22.6 percent of undergraduate women and 5.2 percent of undergraduate men surveyed have experienced some type of nonconsensual sexual contact during their time at Rice, according to the Association of American Universities Climate Survey results released earlier this morning.
More than 150 Rice University community members have signed a petition urging the department of computer science to drop Palantir Technologies from a computer science mixer event on the evening of Oct. 10, due to contention over Palantir’s ongoing contracts with U.S. Immigrations and Customs Enforcement.
British Youtuber Carl Benjamin, also known as Sargon of Akkad, was originally scheduled to speak on campus next week on invitation by the Rice University College Republicans, but the event was suspended following recent campus discussions on sexual assault, according to RUCR Chairwoman Juliette Turner.