News In Rhyme
Herman Cain proposes tax plan
There once was man named Herman Cain
And he offered a tax plan most plain
Calling it nine, nine, nine
Some thought it was fine
But experts met it with disdain
There was another man named Perry
And of Cain's plan he was weary
So he made up his own
And it would require a loan
Without spending cuts most scary
Republican presidential candidate Herman Cain surged ahead in the polls. According to reports from some agencies, Cain has taken the front-runner position.
His main platform—the 9-9-9 plan—composed of a nine percent national income tax, nine percent corporate tax and 9 percent national sales tax has receive considerable media attention.
The fact that no trained economist helped draft the plan has led to considerable derision, especially from those on the left, but Cain's popularity remains high for now.
To counter, Rick Perry offered his own plan with a 20% flat tax that taxpayers could voluntarily opt into and a 20% corporate tax.
Since this plan would drastically reduce government revenue, it also comes with drastic spending cuts, including those to entitlement programs.
The Euro Zone crisis in nursery rhymes
Ring around the continent
A pocketful of Euros
We all fall down!
Hey diddle diddle
Europe has a riddle
The South has debt higher than the moon
The North is tired of paying
And the banks need to be bailed out real soon
The country of Greece sat on a wall
The entire economy had a great fall
All the German monies, And all the French banks
Couldn't put Greece together again!
European countries are continuing to try to stave off the debt crisis this time, convincing banks to accept fifty percent losses on their loans to debt-riddled countries. Investors hope that this will finally help alleviate dangers of the Euro failing.
More from The Rice Thresher
Larry McMurtry (class of ’60), a novelist and screenwriter who attended and taught English courses at Rice University, passed away on March 25 at age 84. He is survived by his wife, son, siblings and grandson.
Rice University announced yesterday that the state of Texas will give the university 4,000 first doses of Pfizer vaccine for distribution on campus. The first clinic will be Thursday, April 1 in Tudor Fieldhouse, according to Vice President of Administration Kevin Kirby.
Several colleges have changed the name of Willy Week this year due to the different structure of the week compared to past years, including the restrictions on the types and frequency of events that can be held due to the pandemic, and because of the ongoing conversation regarding Willy’s statue.