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News In Rhyme

By Anthony Lauriello     8/31/11 7:00pm

National

Hurricane Irene hits near NYC

There was once a storm named Irene



Who got tired of the south Atlantic scene

So she went to the East coast

Destroyed New York almost

But not with the destruction foreseen

Hurricane Irene hit the East Coast and New York City forcing evacuations and causing massive flooding through the region. Despite several deaths and perhaps billions in damages, the storm didn't live up to some expectations, especially those of the mainstream media.

Obama calls joint session

Obama called for a joint session of Congress

But the Republicans see it as one big diss

So Boehner said change the day

And Obama let him have his say

And the president looks even more spineless

President Obama requested the legislative leadership for a joint session of Congress. However, the speech conflicted with a debate for the Republican Primary. Citing procedural and logistical reasons, Speaker of the House John Boehner denied the president's request and forced him to delay it one day.

 

International

Exxon drills oil in Russia

Russia let Exxon go to the Arctic to drill

But crude oil they better not spill

Cause if they go Exxon Valdez

Bring the habitat to its knees

A lot of wildlife it will kill.

The Russian government has granted American corporation Exxon Mobil permission to explore the Russian Arctic for a potentially vast reserve of oil. Despite the company's victory, not everyone is happy, as environmental groups point to the chance of an economic catastrophe.



More from The Rice Thresher

NEWS 4/21/24 11:41pm
Jeremy Zucker headlines second-ever Moody X-Fest

Jeremy Zucker headlined Rice’s second annual Moody X-Fest in Founder’s Court on April 19. In advance of Zucker’s set, student groups like Basmati Beats, Rice Philharmonic and BASYK performed. The festival also offered complimentary merchandise and food from Dripped Birra, Cane’s and Oh my Gogi.

NEWS 4/17/24 5:23pm
Jones wins men’s and women’s Beer Bike races, GSA snags alumni

Jones College won both the women’s and men’s Beer Bike 2024 races, while the Graduate Student Association claimed the alumni team win. Hanszen College bike teams were the runner-up in the alumni and men’s races, while Brown College was the runner-up in the women’s race. Martel and McMurtry Colleges did not bike in the alumni race, according to the Rice Program Council’s final report, and the GSA was disqualified from the men’s race for accidentally sending out two bikers simultaneously.


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