Sex and Dating: You asked, we answered

By Rice Thresher Staff     4/16/19 11:51pm

How does one start dating? Like when is it time to let someone know you like them and would like to date them?

One of the worst things you can do is sit on your feelings, obsessing over someone and annoying all your friends with rants about how cute their hair looks. You can literally just tell them and either they 1) reject you, you listen to some Mitski, stop wasting your time and move on to someone else or 2) you have a whole summer to come up with a disgustingly cute Esperanza ask to win those #freetickies. But don’t do it through a missed encounter. They’re flattering to get but … anonymous. This isn’t a Netflix movie.

For those of us with the confidence to ask someone out but the perfectionist anxiety of doing it absolutely right, don’t wait too long. No one likes to be led on — even if you do eventually decide to go for it, they might’ve already given up on hope that you’ll finally do it. The thought that if you wait, they’ll catch feelings for you too is just a path to pain. 

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I went through a breakup recently, any suggestions for how to get over it?

Relationships take time. Lots and lots of time. Before your ex, you filled that time in other ways, whether it was working on a passion project, shooting hoops at the Rec or keeping up with the Kardashians. Now is the time to remember, or even redefine, who you are as an individual. You might have a hole in your heart right now, but you are a whole person on your own. The ability to do whatever you want whenever you want is a blessing of singledom so seize this time to do just that.

Another way to keep moving forward is to realize all the other romantic (or hookup) possibilities out there. Swiping on a dating app is a beautifully refreshing reminder that other people are into you and that, whenever you’re ready, you might just be into them too.

Lastly, don’t beat yourself for not moving on “fast enough.” None of us do. You’re sad because you experienced something meaningful. Even though it’s over, there are memories you will carry with you and lessons that will shape you, and that’s a beautiful thing.

Is it true that if you write for the Thresher, you’re a virgin?

According to a scientific poll, the average Thresher editorial staff purity score is 38.67 (n = 15). Do what you want with that information.

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