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The Last House on the Left Review

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By Faheem Ahmed     3/19/09 7:00pm

Since when did Hollywood movies start having such crappy titles? There is actually a Channing Tatum film coming out in a couple of months named Fighting. Really? That's the only thing you million-dollar professionals could think of? Hmm, I wonder what that movie is about. The Last House on the Left, on the other hand, can be given some slack because it kept the title of the Wes Craven (A Nightmare on Elm Street series) original that made him one of the greatest horror geniuses of our generation.I fully expected yet another hackneyed suspense remake that had stripped away all semblance of creativity and wit from the original. Fortunately, I was mistaken, and The Last House on the Left was extremely entertaining. The film did not misguide the audience or have any self-delusions of grandeur. It delivers exactly what it promises: an hour and a half of non-stop action, brutal kills and sadistic torture. Sounds like the perfect first date movie, right?

If you are a huge fan of films like Hostel and The Count of Monte Cristo, then you will definitely leave the theater with a satisfied grin plastered across your face. The Last House on the Left is a very emotionally-charged revenge flick, where the audience cheers for the heroes and absolutely detests the villains. There were literally four different occasions when the audience whooped and hollered in group approval, exhilarated by the horrendous violence that had just taken place on screen. Again, this movie is not for the faint of heart and has absolutely no moral message. It just goes to show how much Americans will root for the underdog, even if it involves said underdog impaling heads with hammers or shooting people in the neck.

The plot of the movie is pretty straightforward. A couple and their teenage daughter take a vacation at their idyllic lake house. The daughter goes into town to meet with a friend and they decide to buy some weed from a creepy kid in a motel. Just one catch: The creepy kid's dad and his goons have just busted him out of prison. Uh-oh! The bad guys torture the daughter and her friend, leaving them for dead. The bad guys need somewhere to stay for the night and end up chilling at the parents' lake house, unaware that they have just seriously messed up their only child. Enter ensuing badassery and absolute chaos.



Garret Dillahunt (No Country for Old Men) does a great job playing the lead villain. Despite the horrible acts of violence he commits throughout the movie, he maintains a chilling detachment and is actually quite likable. Tony Goldwyn (Ghost) also does a fine job as the girl's father, displaying the realistic amount of anguish and fury expected of a parent in his situation. Crappy title and all, The Last House on the Left is an extremely entertaining flick that does not disappoint on the brutality meter. I would love to give it a four-star rating, but there really are no overarching ethical themes or morals to be drawn from the movie, unless someone getting their brains microwaved counts.



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