Backpage's Voyage Through the Annals of History

By Tim Faust & Eric Doctor     11/20/08 6:00pm

Welcome to the Backpage's Journey through the Annals of History! Because the Backpage can't go online each week, we've chosen to dig up an article from the Thresher's past and put it online for the world to rediscover. We've also recorded two audio readings in case all these words get too burdensome on your eyes. Please enjoy and send any comment to backpage@rice.edu.This week's article comes from the November 15, 1916, issue of the Thresher. All of the original text has been reproduced, including misspellings and grammatical errors.

Click here to have Tim read you the story.

Click here to have Eric read you the story.

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JUNIOR FEIGNS HE'S FRESHMAN BADLY HAZED; DUPED CITY VISITORS LUG HIM TO HIS ROOM

A great deal of merriment and considerable animated discussion were caused recently through the successful outcome of a couple of practical jokes, both of which show daring in both conception and execution.

Sunday afternoon one of the Junior boys was lowered by some of his classmates into a deep manhole on the Institute grounds. This was done when there were no cars in sight on the boulevard. When all was ready, the conspirators slipped quietly off, to await developments behind the hedge.

Now, on Sunday afternoon, as all the students know, the boulevard becomes a speedway for hundreds of automobiles. The Institute, being one of the show places of the city and an easy ride from the heart of town, becomes the mecca of joy riding mortists.

Groans and moans, together with low and almost inaudible cries for help, attracted the attention of a passing car, the driver and occupants of which immediately got out to investigate. Peering into the dark recesses of the manhole, they beheld a huddle figure, seemingly in deep distress. When they spoke to him his only answer was a moan of anguish. Remembering that it was Sunday, which is a day for good deeds and charitable, the big hearted motorists decided on drastic action. One of them, notwithstanding his smart Sunday raiment, descended into the depths, and slowly and painfully hoisted the victim to the surface.

It was a sad story that the victim told, a tale of persecution by the upperclassmen, of bitter wrong and oppression. The story almost brought tears to the eyes of the women in the party. It was perfectly barbarous, the way some of the poor Freshmen were treated, and the Faculty should intervene.

So they hauled him to the dormitory and assisted him to his room and modestly accepted his profuse thanks. Then they left with the knowledge of duty well done.

Could the autoists have witnessed the wild manifestations of unholy delight after their departure it is very probable that much of their pious joy would have been dispelled, for it was only a joke.

Later in the afternoon of the same day some one conceived the idea that there was a crying need of a traffic officer for the campus. Reckless speeding should summarily be dealt with.

The idea was conceded to be a good one, and was immediately put into effect. A tall, melancholy Freshman was decided upon as sufficiently imposing looking to act the part. But the Freshman was not ambitious to be a cop. He demurred. It availed him not at all. It was darkly intimated to him that unless he complied at once he would dream dreams no mortal ever dared to dream before.

Motorists spinning out along the boulevard and swinging in toward the first gate of the Institute grounds were surprised to see a tall blue coated officer blocking the way. And to their surprise was added annoyance when, with a majestic wave of his hand, he ordered them to stop. In a few minutes a large number of cars were lined up. Then up came a little Ford, and to the surprise of all, it was permitted to pass unchallenged. This was adding insult to injury, and the drivers of some of the big cars were preparing to protest the seeming injustice of the thing when the cop graciously raised his hand, for the boulevard was becoming congested.

The "copper" was dressed in a borrowed band uniform and his girth was considerably increased by the simple expedient of stuffing a pillow under his belt.

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